The Childcare Solution that Works

Whether you have 1 or 5 children, whether you can afford help or not, finding a childcare solution that works is not straight forward.

When we go back to work and have to start finding the “right” person to look after our little one, fear, worry, anxiety and guilt are emotions that come along. 

When we look for school or nurseries and we do not know which one will be best for our children. They are so little and yet we have to take the burden of choosing what is best for them without knowing how they really are.

There is the fear of the unknown, the guilt of not being there at every step of the way. 

These emotions are mixed with the desire to go back to work. Because, as working mothers, we do work not just because we have to but also because we want to. Assuming of course that we are working and doing something that fulfils us, that grows us as a human. Because mothering and working are two different concepts and we might love working more even if we love our children above everything else. 

So what do we do when it comes to delegating the task of looking after our precious ones?

Let’s be honest, becoming a mother and mothering is not something we know from day 1. It takes time, practice, failing and trying again to know what works with our child. The same way that your child is unique, so are you as a mother, so is your mothering style. 

It is hard to find the right childcare because we ourselves are not always sure of what will work for our child. Not being able to control this process can be very uncomfortable!

Back in the days when all groups and families were living together, aside from the family drama that we might have experienced, we did have the concept of helping one another and delegating some of the parts of raising children. The children were also going with older ones and learning from them. There was a lot more freedom to play outside and develop imagination. 

Mothers were not expected to be with children 24/7 and enjoy it too. Today, what is expected of a mother is that she actually does it all and alone. 

This is not something possible as working mothers. We need a community, a support system, a partner and/or friends or other mothers to help along the way. We need to create our village, whatever it may look like. 

I wrote a post blog about it, you can check it out here; I give some websites and tips on how I created my village and support system. How I created a childcare solution that kind of works…

How I created my village as a 21st Century working mum

So let’s face it: the childcare that works is the one that will give you more flexibility and time to do the things that truly matter to you, knowing that the kids are safe and learning something. 

What does it look like for me? 

To me it looks like having my mother over as much as possible, having a nanny and sometimes two ready to help, having the house taken care of a few times a week, being able to ask for help with my husband as much as possible even if he will not be able to. It is knowing that I can ask for help and that doesn’t mean I am less of a mother. 

It also means relying on other mothers, asking for their help, planning on a weekly basis how it might look like. It also looks like asking for help during the week end, organising a sleepover so that we can go away with my husband one evening for instance. 

The childcare that works, can be fragile and temporary and needs to be nurtured. It won’t always be perfect or always work out. You will need to be giving too to be receiving help from others.

There is another issue here, it is the cost of living. This is going to affect working mothers a lot. Feeling like we work just to pay for childcare might not make sense to some families. I find this quite dramatic for working mothers who will feel very frustrated to have to leave their jobs to stay at home. My business coach forwarded me this article from the Guardian which is very relevant to the current situation.

Do you have a childcare that works or “kind of works”… or are you still looking for it?