How to Identify the Root Cause of Emotional Triggers

As a working parent, feeling overwhelmed by emotional triggers is practically a rite of passage. There’s always something demanding your attention – a deadline at work, an unfinished school project, the endless clutter at home. And then, just as you’re managing to juggle it all, a small comment from your partner or child sends you over the edge. Sound familiar?

What’s really happening in these moments isn’t just about the task at hand or the person involved. It’s about your emotional triggers -those internal responses that feel disproportionate to the situation at hand. They’re often tied to deeper emotions like guilt, anger, or fear, and left unexamined, they can cloud your judgment, sap your confidence, and leave you stuck in cycles of frustration. But it doesn’t have to be that way.

What Are Emotional Triggers?

At their core, triggers are unresolved emotional wounds that resurface when a current situation echoes a past experience.

That time your colleague dismissed your idea in a meeting? It might remind you of a moment from your childhood when your opinions weren’t taken seriously.

That pang of guilt when you leave work early to catch your child’s soccer game? It could stem from an internalized belief that you’re not doing enough.

These triggers aren’t “bad” or something to be ashamed of – they’re part of being human. But when they go unchecked, they can take control of your reactions, making it harder to stay present, calm, and creative.

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Why Identifying Your Triggers Is the First Step

Here’s the thing: You can’t manage what you don’t understand. If you’re constantly reacting to situations without knowing why, it’s easy to feel powerless.

But when you take the time to explore the emotions underneath your overwhelm, you begin to create distance between yourself and the trigger. That distance gives you the power to choose your response instead of letting your emotions drive the bus.

How to Start Identifying the Root Cause of Your Emotional Triggers

Pay Attention to Patterns
Start by noticing when and where you feel triggered. Is it during certain types of conversations? When you’re multitasking? Or maybe when you feel someone isn’t appreciating your effort? Recognizing these patterns is the first step to understanding the underlying emotions.
Name the Emotion
This is where curiosity comes in. When you feel that familiar wave of overwhelm, pause and ask yourself: What am I really feeling right now? It might start as frustration, but dig a little deeper. Is there guilt? Fear? Anger? Shame? Disgust? Naming these emotions helps you connect with what’s really going on inside.
Trace It Back
Once you’ve identified the emotion, reflect on where it might be coming from. Ask yourself, What does this remind me of? or When have I felt this way before? It’s not about dwelling on the past but understanding how past experiences might be influencing your current reactions.
Shift Your Perspective
One of the most powerful tools I share with my clients is the question: How do I want to be remembered in this moment? This simple question helps shift your focus from the trigger to the person you want to be. It’s not about being perfect—it’s about aligning your response with your values.

What’s Next? Take the Quiz!

The good news is that you don’t have to navigate this journey alone. I created a short quiz to help you identify the number one trigger holding you back – whether it’s guilt, anger, fear, shame, disgust or something else entirely.

By understanding your primary trigger, you can take the first step toward creating space between your emotions and your reactions.

When you know what’s really driving your overwhelm, you can start to respond with clarity, confidence, and compassion. And that? That’s where the real transformation begins.

Take the Quiz Now

You deserve to feel more peace and presence in your day-to-day life. Let’s uncover what’s been holding you back—and create a path forward.

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**Career Mum Coach | ACC Executive Coach**

Meet Tania!

With three energetic kids, I know what it’s like to have to juggle your career goals and desire to be a good parent. That’s why I’m so passionate about helping working mums manage your time in the best way, so you can spend quality time with your kids and still find the courage to go after what you want in life.